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| John Boehner |
"I will never change my mind about gay marriage and I
don't care if every person in my family, and every single person I know comes
out as gay and asks me to do so. Marriage is one man and one woman—it is what my church
teaches. And besides that, I have a giant steel rod rammed up my ass and I'm totally inflexible."
John Boehner, Speaker of the House
of Representatives, whose personal fortune is estimated at between $1.7 and
$5.5 million, on the March 17 edition of ABC's This Week
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| Jesus Christ |
- - -
"Oh, Johnny. You never change. You've been this way since you were a child—stubborn and cantankerous beyond the point of reason. Your church also teaches you that your body is the
temple of the Holy Spirit, so go have another cigarette, Johnny Boy, I'm sure the Holy Spirit needs some nicotine right now. Your church also teaches it is OK to sexually
assault children and it is OK to cover such things up, so when you're not being a dickhead in Congress, are you out being a pedophile? My Father gave you a wonderful brain with which to think wonderful thoughts and a heart with which to feel great love and emotion. Why not start using those gifts? You wouldn't be half the cocksucker you are now if you did."
Jesus Christ, son of God
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