 |
| Angela Merkel |
“Espionage…
spying… it is not done between friend. I thought Germany and United States were BFFs! I cannot trust Barack Obama any more. His reassurance has but a hallow ring.”
German Chancellor Angela
Merkel, reacting to a report in The Guardian newspaper indicating that according to a 2006 NSA memo, some 35 unidentified leaders of Europe were spied upon by the United States. The memo indicates no valuable information was secured in the effort.
- - -
 |
| Enrico Letta |
"Yeah. What she said."
Italian Prime
Minister Enrico Letta
- - -
 |
| Cristina Fernandez |
"Yeah. What she said."
Argentine President
Cristina Fernandez
"Yeah. What she said."
Peruvian President
Ollanta Humala
- - -
 |
| Dilma Rousseff |
"Yeah. What she said."
Brazilian President
Dilma Rousseff
- - -
 |
| Jean-Marc Ayrault |
"Yeah. What she said."
French Prime Minister Jean-Marc
Ayrault
- - -
 |
| John Kerry |
“Oh come on now! Stop being so fucking ridiculous! As if none of you have ever
engaged in covert activities targeting members of the United States
government! You all probably know what time I took a piss this morning!”
Secretary
of State John Kerry
- - -
 |
| Vladimir Putin |
“5 a.m. I saw the film. You need a checkup, old man.
"Russia spy
on all of you all of the time. And not just cell phones. We have photos. We are
your friends but we do not trust any of you. I totally support what United
States does. No problem. Do it some more. And while they are doing it to us, we
are doing it to them. By the way, Chancellor Merkel, I like the tattoo on your upper inner thigh. I like that it is shaped like Adolf Hitler’s head. And I like that you shave your--”
Russian President Vladimir Putin
- - -
|
| Angela Merkel |
“IT IS
NOT! I DO NOT! HOW DARE YOU! WE DO NOT SPY! We are not dickheads like the United
States… or Russia!”
Chancellor
Merkel
- - -
|
| John Kerry |
“You don’t spy? Then you are just stupid. How
do you know we’re not about to nuke all of you just for being a bunch of
sniveling pansies? For Christ’s sake! Grow up. Especially you, Ayrault. There
is just something about it. There is nothing quite like a French whine.”
Secretary
Kerry
- - -
|
| John Kerry |
"Nice one about the tattoo, Vladimir. Was that true?”
Secretary
Kerry
|
| Vladimir Putin |
- - -
"Of course true. Have you ever known me to tell lie? Isn't it great how the Germans go berserk as soon as you mention Hitler?”
President Putin
