 |
| Jim DeMint |
“You
know, the Heritage Foundation’s report P-R-O-O-O-V-E-S Obamacare will mean
higher insurance premiums for any stupid dumb poor people who sign up for
care—if that damn website the PRESIDENT PERSONALLY DEVELOPED on his own iPad ever works right
and they CAN sign up, that is.”
Jim
DeMint, former senator and president of the Heritage Foundation, a
national conservative ‘think tank’ and political action committee that supports
Tea Party-ish candidates
 |
| Kermit the Frog |
- - - -
“Wel-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l,
maybe, maybe not, Mr. DeMint. Count Von Count has been analyzing your numbers VERY
CLOSELY, and I think he has something to say about them.”
Kermit
the Frog
- - - -
 |
| Count Von Count |
“Numbers. Ah, ah, ah.”
Count
Von Count
- - - -
|
| Kermit the Frog |
“Let me explain. It seems that when you were
adding up your columns of numbers you maybe forgot one pretty fucking important
column, Mr. DeMint, and that would be the amount of money people would receive
in the form of tax subsidies to be used toward the purchase of health insurance
under the Obamacare program. Did you Heritage folk do that intentionally or was
it just a mistake?”
Kermit
|
| Jim DeMint |
- - - -
“We did
not believe it was important. Who knows how realistic those numbers are? What we do know is that Obamacare is going to be a realistic disaster for the entire
world, particularly those who have to pay for it, like the good hard working
Americans who don’t want government involved in every aspect of their lives and
just want to settle down and live peacefully on their Social Security checks
and Medicare.”
Jim
DeMint
- - - -
|
| Count Von Count |
“Numbers are always realistic. Numbers are
real. The Count is real. Ah-ah-ah-ah.”
Count
Von Count
- - - -
|
| Kermit the Frog |
“What the Count means to say is that by
following your logic, who the hell knows how realistic YOUR numbers are going
to be in a month or a year or two years? Your argument goes both ways, you
know. You can’t say their numbers are bad, but yours are good just because they
are yours. And you know, this is reading an awful lot like a Muppet Movie, and you, Mr. DeMint, LOOK and ACT like a perfect Muppet Movie villain.”
Kermit
- - - -
|
| Count Von Count |
“There are no bad numbers. Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah.”
Count
Von Count
- - - -
|
| Jim DeMint |
“Listen. I have a giant shredder here. Do you
have any idea what a shredder can do to felt?”
Mr. DeMint
- - - -
 |
| Miss Piggy |
“Do you have any idea what a pig can do to a
man’s groin? Don’t mess with The Frog, Jimbo, because when you do, you mess
with The Pig.”
Miss
Piggy
|
| Kermit the Frog |
- - - -
“Thanks, Piggy.”
Kermit
