Monday, November 18, 2013

Overheard in the White House Women's Restroom:


President Obama

“What in the fuck is so hard about telling male soldiers they may NOT sexually assault their fellow female or male soldiers and then ensuring they don’t do it? I kind of can’t figure that out because when the Secretary of Defense AND the Commander in Chief says, ‘Keep your dick in your pants,’ it should send a message. If it doesn’t, why is that?”
President Barack Obama






- - -




Secretary Hagel
“We’ve been trying everything, Mr. President, but somehow, we just can’t get the men to stop raping. Everyone seems to be raping everyone else. Well, not everyone. We’ve got men raping women and men raping men. There may be some women raping men and some women raping women, but we’re not sure about that. In a LARGE majority of cases, the women involved seem to all be the victims here, though we can't be sure since most people are too fucking afraid to report when they've been raped. The offenders and their commanders say they can't help themselves because the women have breasts and sometimes wear skirts.”
Secretary of Defense Charles “Chuck” Hagel


- - -

President Obama



“I thought our military was about trust and honor? I thought our military was about high standards? What in the fuck is going on, Chuck. Do you have some problem following instructions?”
President Obama




- - -


 

Secretary Hagel



“Uhmmm … gee … uhmmm … I just dunno what to do sir. I am just at a total loss.”
Secretary Hagel





No comments: