Overheard in Hollywood:

Brooke Mueller

"Oh, gee, Lindsay! We are in rehab together! I sure hope it works this time! This is my 20th attempt to get and stay sober. That should count for something. Maybe I'll be able to get my kids back when I get out. But for now, I'm just glad to be here with you.
I didn't even NEED to come. I just wanted to spend some time
with you!"

Brooke Mueller, former wife of Charlie Sheen, and major addict

- - -

Lindsay Lohan

"Twentieth? Don't sweat it, Meg. The judge doesn't start to get angry until you go over 50. The first thing I need to teach you is which visitors can be counted on to bring back some 'candy' from the 'store,' if you know what I mean.... Gosh, if only my true BFF Paris was here,. we'd have a real party on our hands!"

Lindsay Lohan, addict/troubled celebrity/drunken driver/thief

Paris Hilton

- - -

"You know those THREE thoughts I have every day, Lindsay? Well, you are in BOTH of them. Rehab is hot. Betty Ford was hot in a very dimly lit room. And halsa... jala-hopies.... no... jello-puppets.... oh, fuck.... those little Mexican peppers are hot, too. And don't eat them with your bare hands and then use the ladies room
without washing first!
They are REALLY hot then."

Paris Hilton, heiress/reality TV star/addict