Overheard off Sesame Street:

Kermit the Frog

"Big Bird, can you believe what those rich moms were doing at Disneyworld? Paying disabled people to accompany them in the park so they could use them to get to the head of the lines and avoid waiting!"

Kermit the Frog



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Big Bird

"Why that is just horrible, Kermit! And at the happiest place on earth, too! That sucks shit through a wire brush."

Big Bird

Kermit the Frog

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"It's goddam sinister all right. It's nice that the disabled were getting paid damn good money and all, but still, it seems pretty shady. Smart, but shady."
Kermit

Big Bird

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"Where on earth do you think they came up with that idea, Kermit?"

Big Bird

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Kermit the Frog

"I'll tell you where: 'Elmo's Black Market Guide To Screwing Everyone Else at Disneyworld--Without Ever Taking Off Your Pants,' That's where. That little red sonuvabitch is selling copies at his website. I'm telling you Big Bird, if there is something shady going on, or an illegal buck being made, rest assured, that little red prick is behind it."
Kermit

Big Bird

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"Admit it, Kermit. You're just jealous that you didn't have the idea first."

Big Bird

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Kermit the Frog

"Fuckin-A, Bird. He's getting $19.95 a book and having them printed in China where they cost 15 cents a piece to make! He's a mastermind!"
Kermit


 

Big Bird

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"Uh.... Kermit? Don't we work for Disney?"

Big Bird