Overheard off Sesame Street:

“Ice Cube is a pussy. Check out MY shit. This is going to be on my next CD - Elmo Raps! It will be out in time for Christmas. Just $29.95!”

Elmo

Straight from Sesame

Crazy muppetfucker named Elmo

From a gang called Muppets with Attitudes

When I’m called off

I got a sawed off

Squeeze the trigger and bodies are hauled off

You too Count, if ya fuck with me

The police are gonna hafta come and get me

Off yo’ ass, that’s how I’m going out

For the punk muppetfuckers that’s showing out

Muppets start to mumble, they wanna rumble

Mix ‘em an cook ‘em in a pot like gumbo

Goin’ off on a muppetfucker like that

With a gat that’s pointed at yo ass

So give it up smooth

Ain’t no tellin' when I’m down for a jack move

Here’s a murder rap to keep yo’ dancing

With a crime record like Bert and Ernie

My AK-47 is the tool

Don’t make me act the muppetfucking fool

Me you can go toe to toe, no maybe

I’m knocking muppets out the box, daily, yo weekly, monthly and yearly

Until them dumb muppetfuckers see clearly that I’m down with the capital A-B-C

Boy, you can’t fuck with me

So when I’m in your neighborhood, you better duck

'Cuz Elmo is crazy as fuck

As I leave, believe I’m stompin’

But when I come back, boy,

I’m coming straight from Sesame