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| George Washington |
“Stand
up in a canoe? While crossing the fucking Delaware River? While there were ice chunks floating around the boat? I never did any such
thing! I was too busy holding on for dear life! Have you ever seen the canoes
we used to ride in? Have you ever seen the fucking Delaware? What ASSHOLE comes
up with this stuff?”
George
Washington, believed to be the father of our country,
though paternity tests are inconclusive
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