Overheard on 'Face the Nation':

Bob Schieffer

"Sen. Cruz, you went from being an absolute nobody to being a GOP superstar last year with your bullshit theories and halfwit actions. With the nation's debt again reaching the ceiling, will you again work to shut down the government?"

Bob Schieffer, host of CBS' 'Fact the Nation'

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Ted Cruz

"Bob I have to stop you right there. I actually opposed the government shutdown. President Obama and the Democrats shut down the government, not me. The president would not compromise or negotiate and that's why we had a shutdown. His fault; case closed."

Sen. Rafael 'Ted' Cruz Jr. (R-Texas)

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Bob Schieffer

"My question was would you ever conceive of doing it again."

Bob Schieffer

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Ted Cruz

"I didn't the last time. We should never shut the government down."

Sen. Cruz

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Bob Schieffer

"If you didn't, who the fuck was it that did shut down the government? If you are going to rewrite history, why don't we throw in some really good characters, like maybe some hobbits and orcs? Or maybe some elves and dwarves? Or how about Peter Fucking Cottontail?"

Bob Schieffer

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Ted Cruz

"It was Harry Reid and President Obama who shut down the government. Look, Bob, I understand you are old and suffering from dementia. The White House said it was Republicans that shut the government down, so that's what you think happened, but I voted over and over again to fund the government."

Sen. Cruz

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Bob Schieffer

"Listen up, you lightweight. This is my goddam show and I don't suffer from dementia."

Bob Schieffer

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Ted Cruz

"And I didn't set those TEA Party representatives in the House to put the whole shutdown plan into motion, despite anything they may have told you. What is happening now is the Democrats believe another shutdown will benefit them politically, and they will try to blame it on us when it happens."

Sen. Cruz

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Bob Schieffer

"Look, fuck nut, your fellow Republicans credit you with the shutdown and say it was a disaster. Now, the goddam government is approaching another deadline unless the debt ceiling is raised. Will you agree to raise the debt ceiling this time or will you demand something in return while threatening to turn the nation upside down with your ridiculous partisan bullshit? What's it going to be? Will you be a dick or not?"

Bob Schieffer

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Ted Cruz

"Of course we want something in return. We be fucked up fools to miss this opportunity to hold them over the barrel. The American people expect us to fuck with the president, so of course we will."

Sen. Cruz