 |
| Pope Benedict XVI |
"This
is my last official day as the pope! What can I possibly do to help humanity?
Oh, wait. I don't give a shit about humanity. Humanity is so goddam tiresome. I am supposed to meet with the cardinals, but what do I care of them? Instead,
I shall go shopping. SHOPPING! What a day I shall
have! What shall I buy? Oh, I know—a Penn State football jersey! I shall
wear it with great pride in honor of my friend, Jerry."
Pope
Benedict XVI
 |
| Jerry Sandusky |
- - -
"Hey,
thanks, there, your pontif-ness! The school can use the money to pay legal
expenses, you know what a bitch those are. And thanks for making me an honorary priest and naming me to the 'Papal Gold Circle of Pedophiles.' If I ever get out of jail, I look forward to having my own altar boys."
Jerry
Sandusky, convicted pedophile/child rapist and former assistant football coach at Penn State University
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