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| Pope Benedict XVI |
"As one
of my final non-public acts as pope, I plan to make Jerry Sandusky an honorary
priest. He certainly meets most of the qualifications, especially the part
about raping young boys. He has damaged enough young boys to qualify for the 'Papal Gold Circle of Pedophiles,' which guarantees you a new parish anytime too many people start asking questions. Do you like my hat? I love this hat. I like to wear it to baseball games. I don't get to keep it when I
leave, you know. Nor my red shoes. Heartless bastards. I love this hat."
Pope
Benedict XVI
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