 |
| John McCain |
“What
are you doing talking smack about Gov. Christie! He is the GREAT WIDE HOPE of the Republican Party!”
Sen. John
McCain (R-Arizona)
- - -
 |
| Lindsey Graham |
“I
know you won’t let anything bad happen to me Johnny. Whether you’ll admit it or
not, I hold a very special place in your heart.”
Sen.
Lindsey Graham (R-South Carolina)
- - -
|
| John McCain |
“That’s
true. But if that giant monstrosity comes hunting for you, don’t expect me to jump
in front of you and take the hit. I’m getting a little old to take a hit from a buffalo that size.”
Sen.
McCain
- - -
|
| Lindsey Graham |
“Oh,
come on, Johnny. It will be just like that night we were at that leather bar in
Chicago… what was kit called …
oh yeah … I remember! It was the Chicago Eagle on North Clark Street … I was
wearing my biker leather and you had
on those ass-less chaps …”
Sen.
Graham
- - -
|
| John McCain |
“I have never worn
chaps of any kind in my life, and you know that. I've never even had chapped lips.”
Sen.
McCain
- - -
|
| Lindsey Graham |
“Sure
John. Whatever you say. So there we were, trying to pick up a couple of tasty morsels in the back
of the room when all of a sudden, this giant mountain of a man comes thundering
across the room and points at me, saying, ‘That’s my meat, Biker-ella, so hit
the road!’ You, my little bald knight in shining armor didn’t bat an eye! You
stepped right in front of me and promised to kick his giant fat ass if he even
so much as looked at me cross-eyed again. He did grab his tasty morsel before
he walked away, though. But, Johnny, you were once again my heroine! Why, I
might have gotten my ass plow—er, uhm … kicked … if you hadn’t been there.”
Sen.
Graham
- - -
|
| John McCain |
“I
don’t know what you are talking about but I really do wish you would stop
spreading these stories about me, Biker-ella. I only go to these places because
you drag me to them. And I don’t wear ass-less chaps, feather boas or glittered
suspenders! Ever! I don’t know what these places you drag me to are called or
why they get such interesting patrons. I don’t go to them for anything other
than to keep your scrawny ass out of trouble.”
Sen.
McCain
- - -
|
| Lindsey Graham |
“My
ass isn’t scrawny, Johnny. I’ve still got a bit of a Bubble Butt. Lots of boys
say it’s wonderful.”
Sen.
Graham
- - -
|
| John McCain |
“There.
Mission accomplished, Bubble Butt. I now have the willies. Will you shut the fuck up now?”
Sen.
McCain
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