Friday, February 1, 2013

Overheard in Harrisburg, PA:



Pennsylvania Gov. Tom Corbett

"A lot of people say I'm trying to divert the attention of Pennsylvania residents from all of the things I've totally screwed up or haven't done since taking office two years ago, particularly with regard to the Jerry Sandusky child sexual assault scandal at Penn State University, not to mention my rush to sell the state lottery program and the liquor stores, and they are right as rain. But don't worry. 

"Despite the fact that I totally manipulated and contained the PSU investigation until after I was elected into office and left it for someone else to deal with, I am going to fix it now by using taxpayer dollars to sue the NCAA over the $60 million fine imposed on PSU. What? Penn State isn't a state-owned school therefore the governor has no power or authority with regard to how the university operates? Then why the hell is it named THE Pennsylvania State University? What? The university is not participating in the lawsuit? What? I haven't done a single thing to help survivors of child sexual assault since taking office and have instead cut education and human services funding at every opportunity?  

"Quit using facts to make me look bad, dammit, and just eat the gruel I'm feeding you."
Pennsylvania Governor and former state's attorney general Tom Corbett (R)

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