Overheard at The Vatican:

Jesus Christ

"Really Franny? For your first big challenge to the world you go after slave labor and say 'it is bad' and 'the Lord doesn't like it.' Ooooooh. Pope Francis I is sooooo scary. That's like saying you don't like beheadings because they are messy. Get on with it. Stop fucking around and make the world a better place. Set up an assistance program to help the families. Sell a painting and build housing for them. Storm the factory and throw holy water on the owners. Don't just talk. Your accent is too damn thick and most people can't understand you anyway. Thank ME for closed captioning. But just between you and me, Franny, don't you think this is a little ludicrous coming from the Catholic Church after that whole Magdalene Laundries thing? The last one in Ireland didn't close until 1996, you asswipe. That's not long enough for you to start riding a high horse. And your slaves weren't paid anything. I'm just saying... And yes, it is Greek day again."

Jesus Christ, son of God