Overheard at the Senate Bath House:

John McCain

 "You realize you have no facts that like the White House to the IRS' targeting of conservative TEA Party groups, right?

Sen. John McCain (R-Arizona) whose net worth is somewhere between $3.2 and $15.2 million. He is best known for being angry, though as of late, he appears to be receiving regular shots of testosterone.

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Darrell Issa

"Who needs evidence. Fuck you, McCain. I have innuendo, shallow circumstantial evidence that shows nothing and an agency all Americans love to hate for any possible reason. What more do I possibly need?

Rep. Darrell Issa (R- California), who is the second wealthiest member of the House of Representatives with a net worth valued at $215 to $745 million

John McCain

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"Well, being right, or even half right, would be a start."
Sen. McCain

Darrell Issa

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Oh, fuck that, McCain. Like you have always used facts. The

public doesn't want facts. The facts are too hard to understand and they're boring."

Rep. Issa

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John McCain

"Be that as it may, leave Jay Carney alone. He's a paid employee and that's all. He grew up in the ghettos of Honolulu with the president and me, and he was part of the raid President Obama led to free me from that POW camp during the Vietnam War, so I have a moral obligation to defend them both. I know 873 ways to kill a man with nothing more than a guitar pick and a taco shell so back the fuck off. Plus, I just don't fucking like you. No one does. You are rich and you are mean. I think you need to get laid. Several times, maybe."
Sen. McCain

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"Don't listen to him Darrell. I like you a LOT! You're wrong about Carney and the IRS and the White House, but you are just drop-dead gorgeous with those dark features of yours and your deep brown eyes. You've got that look a girl could just DIE for. Hub-ba hub-ba."

Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-South Carolina), America's favorite hermaphrodite lawmaker, who has a net worth of somewhere between $600,000 and $1.3 million

Darrell Issa

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"Leave me alone, Lindsey. I don't want YOU to like me and I WILL hit you."
Rep. Issa
 

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 "Promises, promises. You naughty boy. Wanna borrow my whips?"

Sen. Graham