 |
| Newt Gingrich |
“This man is not my twin brother.
That is a vicious rumor started by Bojangles Muldoon, the writer of this blog,
and I resent it. Muldoon is a liar with a potty mouth. Shithead.”
Newt Gingrich, former Speaker of the House
- - -
 |
| Benny Hill Gingrich |
“Aww, come on, Newtie! Why deny me
any longer? We’re brothers!”
Benny Hill Gingrich, British comedian and long-denied fraternal twin brother of Newt.
|
| Newt Gingrich |
- - -
“I have never seen you before in my
life. And I certainly never watched your vulgar TV show.”
Newt Gingrich
|
| Benny Hill Gingrich |
- - -
“I can prove we are brothers.”
Benny Hill Gingrich
|
| Newt Gingrich |
- - -
“If it is a birth certificate you’ve
got, it’s a fake.”
Newt Gingrich
|
| Benny Hill Gingrich |
- - -
“Nope. What I have is this: ‘What is the difference between a whore and a vitamin?’”
Benny Hill Gingrich
|
| Newt Gingrich |
- - -
“’I can’t make a vitamin!’ SHIT. I shouldn’t have answered that. How did I know that?”
Newt Gingrich
|
| Benny Hill Gingrich |
- - -
“’I’ve never been so insulted in all my life…’”
Benny Hill Gingrich
|
| Newt Gingrich |
- - -
“’It’s not my fault! You should
get out more.’
GODDAMIT. How do I know these punch lines? I can’t keep myself from answering these.”
Newt Gingrich
|
| Benny Hill Gingrich |
- - -
“’Officials in the UK have announced drivers will soon switch
to drive in the right-hand lane as is done in the United States…’”
Benny Hill Gingrich
- - -
|
| Newt Gingrich |
“’Reportedly, the switchover will be made gradually.’
FUCK! How do I know these punch lines?”
Newt Gingrich
- - -
|
| Benny Hill Gingrich |
“You know the punchlines ’cuz you are my brother, Newtie! ‘Why do we wash our clothes in Tide?’”
Benny Hill Gingrich
Benny Hill Gingrich
- - -
“’Because it’s too damn cold out-Tide!’ HO HO HO! I always loved that one! HOLY FUCK! I think we are brothers! Wow. I think I am
starting to remember...”
Newt Gingrich
(...to be continued...)
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