 |
| Martha Raddatz |
“Hey!
Bojangles Muldoon! You know, insulting my appearance is one thing, but
suggesting I don’t know anything about journalism is another thing altogether. I
make a bazillion dollars a year! How the hell much do you earn a year, bitch? What
the hell do you mean I don’t know anything about how journalism is supposed to
work?”
Martha
Raddatz, ABC White House correspondent and regular guest host for ABC’s ‘This Week’
Sunday morning news program
- - - -
 |
| Walter Cronkite |
“Let me hand this one, Bojangles. It’s the
least I can do for a friend, and frankly, I don’t like this uppity broad
anyway. What he means, Miss Martha Raddatz, is that a real journalist, print,
broadcast or radio, does not have an agenda beyond finding out the truth. What
a journalist is supposed to do is make sure everyone is telling the truth, without having an agenda. In your
show on Sunday, you very clearly had an agenda: to inflate the position of the
Tea Party, for whatever reason, and to beat down anyone who suggested that the
Democratic President and Senate are doing anything positive in America today.
You were pretty obvious in your handling, and sometimes mauling, of guests.”
Walter
Cronkite, legendary broadcast journalist
- - - -
|
| Martha Raddatz |
“Walter, that’s just bullshit. Reporters always have an agenda, usually it is to
raise viewership or readership, because then, you know, ad rates can increase
and everyone gets a salary increase. And God knows, George Stephanopoulos and I certainly
deserve those on a very regular basis.”
Martha
Raddatz
- - - -
|
| Walter Cronkite |
“Of course you do. But why is it that people
listened to me and believed what I said, while today they just don’t trust any
news reporters today EXCEPT someone who isn’t really doing the news—Jon
Stewart?”
Walter
Cronkite
- - - -
|
| Martha Raddatz |
“Because people are stupid and don’t give a
shit.”
Martha
Raddatz
- - - -
|
| Walter Cronkite |
No.
While the the American public doesn’t give a shit about most things, it does
care about SOME things. And one of those is whether or not they are being lied
to or not. Unfortunately for America, it is left to people like you, people way
more enamored with the sound of their own voices than they are with finding the
real story. People used to wait for journalists to tell them what the truth
was, but you kids today are just too lazy to get to the bottom of an issue and
then come out and say, ‘Well, an analysis of the data demonstrates Sen.
So-and-So is just a flat out a lying cocksucker.’ Try saying that. It’s fun.”
Walter
Cronkite
- - - -
|
| Martha Raddatz |
“But the network bosses don’t want it done
that way, Walter! It's just too messy! And HARD!”
Martha
Raddatz
- - - -
|
| Walter Cronkite |
But
that’s the part that REALLY makes
your juices flow, and Martha, one look at you says your juices haven’t flowed
in a while. Going out there and telling the truth, when you know it is going to
piss off everyone from the president of the United States right down to the
president of your news division because the story is so GODDAM right that it makes your heart sing Queen songs a cappella! That, my dear,
is what this is all about. Now shut the fuck up and go do it. AT LEAST TRY! I’m a frigging
corpse for Christ’s sake. I can’t be spending the whole day talking to you. I
have decaying to do.”
Walter
Cronkite
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