 |
| John Kerry |
“President Putin, who do you think you are anyway? You can’t go around invading countries
on some trumped-op pretext! That is just wrong. And if Russia wants to sit at
the grown-up table, it needs to act like it.
Secretary of State
John Kerry
- - -
 |
| Vladimir Putin |
“So,
Secretary of State Johnny ‘Longface’ Kerry, you say that no country should
invade another on a phony pretext, is that what you believe? This is what the
mighty United State of America believes?”
Russian President Vladimir Putin
- - -
|
| John Kerry |
“Yes,
that is what the United States believes and how we try to behave.”
Secretary
Kerry
- - -
|
| Vladimir Putin |
“Then
how could United States go marching into Iraq on the pretext of Saddam Hussein
having weapons of mass destruction, when the only WMD he had was his breath,
and there was no evidence of any connection between Iraq and the 9/11 terrorist
action?”
President
Putin
- - -
 |
| John Kerry |
“I
wasn’t secretary of state back then, Mr. Putin, so I can’t really address
that.”
Secretary
Kerry
- - -
|
| Vladimir Putin |
“No?
But as senator, you did vote in favor
of Iraq invasion, and then you defended the action when you ran for president,
even though it was very clear there were no WMDs to be found anywhere in Iraq.
You come over here acting all high-and-mighty
but the United States has its own history of bullshit actions.”
President
Putin
- - -
|
| John Kerry |
“Just
because we did it doesn’t mean you can.”
Secretary
Kerry
- - -
|
| Vladimir Putin |
“And
just because you say I can’t doesn’t mean I should walk away,
Johnny Longface, no matter how much American righteous indignation you hurl at me with your accusatory glances. Now leave me alone, I have civilians to slaughter. Oh, and gay boys, too.”
President
Putin
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