Overheard in Washington, D.C.:

Barack Obama

"More security at American embassies? I've ALWAYS supported that. Forever, in fact. Before I was born. Long before Benghazi, that's for goddam sure. It was Congress that cut those funds, not me. I've been doing some pretty stupid shit as of late, but I did not do that."

President Barack Obama

Overheard on 'This Week':

John McCain

"Benghazi makes me angry. But so does everything else."

Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) whose net worth is somewhere between $3.2 and $15.2 million.

Overheard in Washington, D.C.:

Marco Rubio

"This Benghazi witch hunt is not about politics. It's about...

"...Wait... What?...

"...Guys, what the fuck am I supposed to say here? Jesus Christ! I haven't got all day. Oh yeah...

"This Benghazi witch hunt is about holding Democrats accountable for things which they are not responsible and cannot control...

"...What? I said it wrong? Well, write the fucking cue cards just a little bit bigger next time, will you, asshole?"

Sen. Marco Rubio (R-Florida), who is joining fellow GOP members in beating the Benghazi mess into the ground in an effort to divert attention from the unending list of things they SHOULD be doing.

Overheard in Washington, D.C.:

Sen. Lindsay Graham

"Benghazi! Benghazi! Benghazi! No secretary of defense or CIA director for you, Mr. President—not until I'm satisfied! And if that means holding my breath until I turn blue, I'll do it. Just watch me. Nothing gets past me until I get all the answers a prissy little queen pitching a hissy fit deserves. " 

Sen. Lindsay Graham (R-S.C.), renowned lesbian and president/charter member of the national "I'm a Flaming Asshole" Club.