Overheard in Wyoming:

Dick Cheney

“Liz, I think you need some time off from the campaign trail. You see a bit stressed… I would like you to go back to ‘The Hospital’ for a while and we will bring you back out when we need you for a campaign event. This way, you will be able to just sit quietly and use your crayons without anyone from the media bothering you. What do you think about that?”

Dick Cheney, former vice president and demon from hell.

Liz Cheney

- - -

“No DADDY! NO DADDY! I don’t WANNA go back to the hospital. I wanna be a SENATOR! They make me eat Jell-O at The Hospital and I don’t like it! Plus every time I try to let someone hear a color, I get into trouble.”

Liz Cheney

Dick Cheney

- - -

“Well, sweetie, I think you have hurt a couple of people really bad by jamming crayons into their ears. Six of them lost their hearing! You need to just listen to your crayons yourself and not share them with anyone.”

Dick Cheney

Liz Cheney

- - -

 

“NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
I don’t WANNA GO!”

Liz Cheney

- - -

Dick Cheney

“You just stop that screaming right now, young lady! Do you want me to get my strap out? Do you want a beating? Maybe that’s what you need, Lizzie. A good solid old-fashioned lesson from your daddy? Just like the kind I used to give you? Maybe that’s what you want? Is it? No? Well then, listen up, you stupid little bitch. You are inches away from fucking up this Senate campaign so I need to stash you back at The Hospital until I get things fixed. So just quit your caterwauling and let’s get going!”

Liz Cheney

Dick Cheney

- - -

“OK, Daddy. I’m sorry. Don’t forget my crayon box.”

Liz Cheney